I’ve always been motivated by change and new challenges. I love the impossible, the unattainable. I like surprising people by achieving goals beyond, even my own, expectations. I’ve not always had the privilege of working for someone who encourages this type creativity and innovation…until this year. A few months ago, I was feeling a little stuck and really craving a new challenge. I had a few out of the box ideas that I brought to my Director. One idea involved pitching a story to a major non-industry related magazine publication. The other idea involved nominating one of our senior principals, a passionate and motivating speaker, to give a TEDTalk in 2014. Since our industry is about 10 years behind in all-things marketing/communications related, these are ambitious goals. This was the first time that I pitched an idea to my new Director, so I braced myself for a heavy sigh and a beat-around-the-bush no. Her response, shocked me, in the best way possible. She said, “Usually when a concept seems risky, I know it’s a good idea, because I know it will get people’s attention.” What?! This is a woman who understands innovation. She knows the value in taking risk, breaking out of comfort zones, and making lasting impressions. Not only did she get behind my ideas, she has continually offered her support without taking over. She’s found the perfect balance of leadership, which allows me to fully benefit from her expertise, without losing autonomy and ownership. This empowering style of leadership pushes me to be unlimited, to always reach for the unattainable. To think big, and take risk that make me nervous. Because, in doing so, I can make a lasting impression.
Can you be liked as a leader?
Jeff Haden wrote a great article recently in INC Magazine, called “6 Habits of Remarkably Likable People.” As I’m currently reading Lean In by Sheryl Sandberg and have been putting a lot into the ”likability” of a person. Controversial thought suggest that, especially for women, the more successful we become, the less we are liked. Below I’ve included Jeff’s thoughts on the six habits of remarkably likable people:
1) They lose the power pose.
Our parents taught us to stand tall, square our shoulders, stride purposefully forward, drop our voice a couple of registers, and shake hands with a firm grip. White that is a great to display of nonverbal self-confidence, it can also seem like you are trying to establish your importance. That makes the “meeting” seem like it’s more about you than it is the other person. Take a look at how Nelson Mandela greets Bill Clinton:
So, the next time you meet someone, relax, step forward, tilt your head towards them slightly, smile, and show that you’re the one who is honored by the introduction. We all like people who like us. If I show you I’m genuinely happy to meet you, you’ll instantly start to like me.
2) They embrace the power of touch.
Nonsexual touch can be very powerful. Touch can influence behavior, increase the chances of compliance, make the person doing the touching seem more attractive and friendly. Go easy, of course: Pat the other person lightly on the upper arm or shoulder. Make it casual and non-threatening. Try this: The next time you walk up behind a person you know, touch them lightly on the shoulder as you go by. I guarantee you’ll feel like a more genuine greeting was exchanged. Touch breaks down natural barriers and decreases the real and perceived distance between you and the other person—a key component in liking and in being liked.
3) They whip out their social jiu-jitsu.
You meet someone. You talk for 15 minutes. You walk away thinking, “Wow, we just had a great conversation. She is awesome.” Then, when you think about it later, you realize you didn’t learn a thing about the other person. Remarkably likeable people are masters at Social Jiu-Jitsu, the ancient art of getting you to talk about yourself without you ever knowing it happened. SJJ masters use their interest, their politeness, and their social graces to cast an immediate spell on you. It’s sounds easy, and it is. Just ask the right questions. Stay open-ended and allow room for description and introspection. Ask how, or why, or who. As soon as you learn a little about someone, ask how they did it. Or why they did it. Or what they liked about it, or what they learned from it, or what you should do if you’re in a similar situation.
3) They whip out something genuine.
Everyone is better than you at something. Let them be better than you. Don’t try to win the “getting to know someone” competition. Try to lose. Be complimentary. Be impressed. Admit a failing or a weakness. You don’t have to disclose your darkest secrets. If the other person says, “We just purchased a larger facility,” say, “That’s awesome. I have to admit I’m jealous. We’ve wanted to move for a couple of years but haven’t been able to put together the financing. How did you pull it off?” Don’t be afraid to show a little vulnerability. People may be (momentarily) impressed by the artificial, but people sincerely like the genuine.
4) They ask for nothing.
You know the moment: You’re having a great conversation, you’re finding things in common… and then bam! Someone plays the networking card. And everything about your interaction changes. Put away the hard-charging, goal-oriented, always-on kind of persona. If you have to ask for something, find a way to help the other person, then ask if you can. Remarkably likeable people focus on what they can do for you—not for themselves.
5) They “close” genuinely.
“Nice to meet you,” you say, nodding once as you part. That’s the standard move, one that is instantly forgettable. Instead go back to the beginning. Shake hands again. Use your free hand to gently touch the other person’s forearm or shoulder. Say, “I am really glad I met you.” Or say, “You know, I really enjoyed talking with you.” Smile: Not that insincere salesperson smile that goes with, “Have a nice day!” but a genuine, appreciative smile. Making a great first impression is important, but so is making a great last impression.
6) They accept it isn’t easy.
All this sounds simple, right? It is. But it’s not easy, especially if you’re shy. The standard, power pose, “Hello, how are you, good to meet you, good seeing you,” shuffle feels a lot safer. But it won’t make people like you. So accept that it’s hard. Accept that being a little more deferential, a little more genuine, a little more complimentary and a little more vulnerable means putting yourself out there. Accept that at first it will feel risky. But don’t worry: When you help people feel a little better about themselves—which is reason enough—they’ll like you for it.
http://www.inc.com/jeff-haden/6-habits-of-remarkably-likeable-people.html?nav=featured
Success
The further I progress in my career, the more appreciation I have for great leadership. Even great leaders—who seem to naturally just have it all—face a multitude of challenges every day. The Marketing Director of my firm spends her time communicating strategy, helping people through developmental challenges, holding on to excellence in the face of compromise, and just navigating management at the firm. It’s safe to say that the work doesn’t end—even after you get to the top. One of the many things that I admire about the leadership in my department is the willingness and desire to work with the team as an equal. In my experience, I’ve seen leadership executed in two ways: 1) in charge, or 2) not there. For the first time in my career, I’m experiencing a different kind of leadership—a kind where a leader can sit with their team without needing to be in charge, using their subject matter knowledge the same way as anyone else around the table would. It’s acting as a resource—and just another member of the team.
Les McKeown, author of “Predictable Success” (@lesmckeown) wrote an article recently in INC. about this same topic. He offers some key advice for leaders, which I’ve provided below:
1. Start with something small. Pick a topic that’s controllable. Don’t start with something that bets the ranch. It’ll only make you anxious, and you’ll end up grabbing the reins back when things lurch off kilter.
2. Start with something you’re not passionate about. Find a topic that doesn’t fire you up. Maybe new employee on boarding rather than redesigning the entire company’s branding, for example. Again, you want to be able to take part in the discussion dispassionately.
3. Nominate a leader (and tell them). Put someone else on charge of leading a session on your selected topic. Tell them everyone in advance, but don’t lobby them. Or tell them how to lead the session. The goal is that you hand over facilitation to someone else, not that they become your glove puppet.
4. Be there. Sit through the entire meeting. Resist the temptation to absent yourself when things get boring or granular. That’s not being a resource, that’s cherry-picking. Everyone else has to work through the detail, and you should, too.
5. Participate. Sitting in stony silence isn’t being a resource any more than dominating the meeting. Participate, which means contributing when you have something to share that will be helpful to the rest of the group, and staying quiet when you don’t.
6. Be comfortable with silence. There is a time for silence, however the point at which everyone expects you to jump in and take over the meeting. Initially everyone will turn to you when a question is asked, or a decision has to be made. Say nothing, not even an explanation of what you’re doing. Jut be quiet, and get comfortable with silence. Let the person you put in charge of the session tease out participation from the rest of the group. If you do it, you’re back in charge.
7. Take an action point or two. When it comes to mopping up the implementation points and doling out responsibility, take on a few for yourself. And don’t cherry pick the “leadery” stuff. Take some granular, janitor-level action points as well.
8. Resist the temptation to mop up afterward. When the session is over, let things sit as they are. Resist the temptation to email/call/drop in on others and recalibrate the results to reflect what you would have preferred the outcome to be. Do this once and no-one will trust you in a resource role again. They’ll just conclude (rightly) that you’re only pretending.
9. Rinse and repeat. Try it again after a while, this time with something larger, more strategic. Note what works and what doesn’t. Find your own style, you’re own way of “being there”, not just absent or in charge.
You can also read the full INC article here:
http://www.inc.com/les-mckeown/hardest-leadership-skill-to-learn.html
http://www.inc.com/les-mckeown/hardest-leadership-skill-to-learn.html
Start With Why
Start with Why is a great book by Simon Sinek. You can purchase the book through amazon here:
and you can check out Simon’s TEDTalk How great leaders inspire action here:
http://on.ted.com/t7Sz
Over the next few weeks, as I finish the book, I’m going to recap some of my favorite points on The Culture Difference blog.
Chapter 1: Assume You Know (excerpt from page 14 – page 15)
There is a wonderful story of a group of American car executives who went to Japan to see a Japanese assembly line. At the end of the line, the doors were put on the hinges, the same as in America. But something was missing. In the United States, a line worker would take a rubber mallet and tap the edges of the door to ensure that it fit perfectly. In Japan, that job didn’t seem to exist. Confused, the American auto executives asked at what point they made sure the door fit perfectly. Their Japanese guide looked at them and smiled sheepishly, “We make sure it fits when we design it.” In the Japanese auto plant, they didn’t examine the problem and accumulate data to figure out the best solution—they engineered the outcome they wanted from the beginning.
Every instruction we give, every course of action we set, every result we desire, starts with the same thing: a decision. There are those who decide to manipulate the door to fit to achieve the desired result and there are those who start from somewhere very different. Though both courses of action may yield similar short-term results, it is what we can’t see that makes long-term success more predictable for only one. The one that understood why the doors need to fit by design and not by default. In the book, Simon talks about how this is applied to hiring the right people and building a successful organization.
Start-Up Stories
This month’s issue of INC Magazine featured an amazing article, “How I Got Started” which touches on the start-up stories of eight of the world’s most revered entrepreneurs. These defining stories about gambles that paid off, near-fatal screwups, and unexpected acts of grace are truly inspiring. It’s stories like this that reinforce entrepreneurship’s reputation as being thrilling and unpredictable. A few big picture take-aways include:
1. Look for the opportunity no one else sees. – Bobbi Brown
Bobbi credits her grandfather, Papa Sam, for her business savvy. An immigrant from Russia, Sam owned a successful car dealership in Chicago. One day a man came into the dealership with a large shopping bag. None of the salesman would approach him because he looked like he was ‘homeless’. Sam put his arm around the man and said, “How ya doing, Boss?” That homeless-looking man bought two cars that day. He paid in cash, which he was carrying in the shopping bag. Lesson: keep your eyes open, because you never know what’s going to come your way.
2. Embrace your strengths and hire around your weaknesses. – Clive Davis
Clive Davis recalls a time when R&B starting changing and hip-hop and rap were entering the picture. It’s a time when he realized what he, personally, could not do. It’s not about delegating. It’s about realizing that you really need someone else to strengthen your organization and help you foresee trends that yo might overlook. Lesson: It never pays to be a know-it-all.
3. Have the confidence to say no. – Tony Hawk
Tony Hawk learned the hard way that distractions in business can be dangerous. At the start of his business, he hired people who knew what they were doing and was able to step out of the day-to-day grind of the business. In this role, he could provide the oversight needed to run a healthy, successful business. When the business shifted its focus to products outside of the skate world, things took a turn for the worse. The company lost several million trying to sell a high-end denim line. Later, Tony’s partner wanted to start a surfboard brand. It was then that he realized how dangerous it was for the business to lose its focus. Ultimately, Tony bought out his partner and was able to re-focus his attention on the skate industry. A few hard-learned lessons gave Tony the confidence to turn down opportunities that don’t fit the brand. Lesson: it’s easy to lost focus. Don’t.
Stress-Free Workaholic
Is there really such a thing as a stress-free workaholic? I think so. I think it’s possible to do more, without feeling overwhelmed. In part, this requires keen time management skills. Steve Tobak, columnist for Inc.com, outlines three simple rules that can help you do more, while making it feel like you are doing less:
1. Learn to give up—sort of.
When you are over-stressed and over-worked, and the ideas just won’t come, give up. Seriously: Just call it quits. Go home, go for a run, whatever. Once you relax, that’s when inspiration flows.
2. Work your tail off when you have to, not when you don’t.
Business happens in spurts. Whether you’re developing a product or building a business, those long hours don’t go on forever. It’s OK to kill yourself for a few weeks or months, as long as you can chill out for a while when it’s over. If you overwork yourself constantly, you’re asking for trouble.
3. Don’t take it out on others.
Maybe you can function at a high level, but if you’re simultaneously demotivating your team, then what’s the point? And if you take it out on family and friends, you’re just going to end up lonely and depressed.
Bottom Line vs. Culture
Tony Hsieh, Zappos CEO
I recently read this quote from Zappos CEO, Tony Hsieh on hiring:
“We’ve actually passed on smart, talented people who could have had an immediate impact on our bottom line because they don’t fit in with the company culture.”
A Better To-Do List
I’ve always considered myself disciplined and good at time management; however, there’s always room for improvement. Below are a few tips on how to create and manage a better to-do list:
1. Prioritize your goals.
It’s important to meet deadlines, yes, but the items with the most immediate deadlines should not dominate your workday. Carefully consider which tasks will bring you closer to your most important goals.
2. Eat that frog.
I highly recommend reading, Eat that Frog! by Brian Tracy. It’s a quick read, with some really useful tips on being more productive and managing your time better. The idea is that you tackle the biggest, ugliest frog (task) first. Get it out-of-the-way first. Then move on to other, perhaps smaller, less ugly frogs.
3. Keep your list lean.
By simply eliminating the bottom 20 percent of your to-do list, you can focus on more pressing items. Assuming you have prioritized your goals first, eliminating these items should not negatively affect your productivity or set you back for the day.
Lessons from Kindergarten
I love this recent post from Naomi Simson about the four business rules we all learned in Kindergarten. I’ve recapped her original post below. I would like to add a fifth rule, that incorporates an adult “nap time.”
One of RedBalloon’s business values is ‘a sense of humor and fun’. I am blessed to come to bound out of bed every day looking forward to my day at work. It strikes me that the basic tenants of encouraging fun and productivity in the workplace, I learnt between the ages of three and five.
If we share everything, play, be curious, hold hands and stick together. My bet is that we’d all manage to stay much more inspired at work and therefore intent on staying.
While this may sound like common sense, it doesn’t hurt to reflect on the simple things in life that made our younger years so much easier than life seems to be today.
Share Everything
When I was an employee in other people’s businesses I regularly heard ‘We need to improve our communication’. RedBalloon has a clearly defined, daily huddle schedule, weekly team meetings, one on ones, monthly company meetings and planning sessions – the agenda has three items, what is working, not working and where are you stopped. A problem shared is a problem halved and in most cases solved. This way the exercise creates stability, cohesion and transparency. It’s better to over communicate and be completely transparent – good news or bad.
Play
Games are really useful tools to keep people focused. We are all young at heart and appealing to this is an easy way to keep engaged.
Be Curious
Look and listen to colleagues and when something amazing happens, celebrate it. We all achieve great things in our roles everyday, yet many fail to acknowledge when we go above and beyond the call of duty. It’s very easy to forget, especially in the current employment market that most people have a choice about where they choose to spend their time.
Recognizing people is actually very straightforward and goes a long way to keep everyone motivated. Whether you opt for peer-to-peer recognition, customer feedback or more traditional management discretion, making sure that you have ample opportunity for formal and reward backed ‘thank you’ and ‘good effort’ celebrations is key to keeping people engaged and happy.
Hold Hands and Stick Together
I always remember the times that I was the newbie – quite often a very nerve-wracking time. The sooner someone feels part of something, connected to their colleagues, the vision of what the business is embracing, the sooner that attachment is possible. Wouldn’t the world be a better place if at three o’clock every afternoon we all sat down to milk and cookies? Whether it is a regular team lunch, beers after work or something more unusual like a group circus lesson, cooking class or hypnosis show, doing something as a group that is totally unrelated to what we do at work allows us to reconnect as human beings. The leveling effect of watching the top sales person get nervous at the trapeze or highly skilled programmer fail to toss a pancake is great for team morale.
“Share everything. Play fair. Don’t hit people. Put things back where you found them. Clean up your own mess. Don’t take things that aren’t yours. Say you’re sorry when you hurt somebody. Wash your hands before you eat. Flush. Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you. Live a balanced life – learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some. Take a nap every afternoon. When you go out into the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands, and stick together.”
Most of all, Kindergarten was fun. And it’s okay to have fun in business.
The original post can be viewed here:
http://www.linkedin.com/today/post/article/20130117051936-1291685-four-business-rules-i-learnt-in-kindergarten
What’s your guiding principle?
What’s your guiding principle?
A response from Ping Fu, CEO of Geomagic.
“Bend, not break is a lesson I learned from my Shanghai Papa, who raised me in China and told me about the ‘three friends of winter.’ He taught me the pine tree stays green in the bitter cold, the plum blossom shows its brilliance when it snows and no other thing will smile, and bamboo is flexible and won’t break. He told me, ‘Ping, you must be bamboo.’ During the oppressive years of the Cultural Revolution and throughout my entrepreneurial journey, I’ve found this story to be very comforting, because there were many cases where I needed to bend—but not break.”
Ping Fu co-founded the software firm Geomagic in 1997. Her new memoir, Bend, Not Break, contrasts her persecution in China with her rise in the American tech industry.
